Show me the money!

Vision in June


June already! Wow this year is in overdrive. 

I thought I’d grab an awkward family photo for posterity’s sake today.

We had 14 members in attendance today and missed a few regulars.   Our one new member was first cab off the rank with the critiques today and I really hope he wasn’t overwhelmed with the feedback we gave him. It takes guts to submit to a bunch of people you’ve never met. So kudos were well deserved.

Our take away message today is a standard issue for writing. However it is one of THE most important things to remember.

Show, don’t tell.

Can you imagine a sweeping epic fantasy being written like a shopping list of occurrences? 

The knight got on the horse. He road out of the castle gates. He got to his destination and saved the damsel in distress. *Yawn*

But if

The knight strode confidently to his fastest stallion, and mounted the dark, snorting beast in one fluid movement. Taking the reins in his gloved hands, he turned the horse in the direction of the fortified castle gates and let the brute find his stride as they cut a blazing path through the fields. He had to find his beloved Princess before it was too late. etc etc etc

Okay so that isn’t the most sterling example, and my sentences are most likely far too long, but you get the idea I hope. 

For those of you who are better writers than I am, feel free to leave your version of the above scenario to show us how you would show, not tell. 

Have a jovial June everyone. Keep making pages!!!

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